Quick Snap – Iran you so silly

Iran, really.

I mean it appears you shot down one of our creepy drones (Predator, Reaper, Shadow, Global Hawk, Captain Marvel, whatever..) so walk over to your little tally sheet and make your mark.

Puff your chest out and slap hands with your bros, bro. In this military rap battle we get to go next, with, god in heaven help us, the Trumpster ready to take the stage.

In the meantime, let’s stop it with the fake photos. Your boys at the IRNA, the state run news agency, released this image and went all mic drop on us.

ohh you got us….

Except, this is 2019, and any 13-year-old with Google can do a quick image search and find that the photo you released was from the downing of a drone over Yemen two years ago.

hmmm

And who knows if that was even a drone you shot down over Yemen. Look Iran, let’s talk for a minute. Hear me out.

We have this idea in American Journalism, and yes people it still gets taught in journalism schools – of not faking images. No excessive crops (looking at Trump inaugural pics) or “photoshopping”. People have lost their jobs at every level of American media for fooling about with images.

Why? Well if you edit one, and we catch you, it then puts every other image you have ever submitted or released into question. Can’t trust you.

North Korea currently holds the top spot in terrible edited propaganda bullsh*t. Observe.

uhh… missing some shadows…
cloned bread
But you have done this before Iran. Note the cloned missiles.

Look I get it. You are trying to live up to that sign you slap coming out of the locker room… To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of their women!

But we have eyes. And computers. And photoshopping your victories just makes you look petty. Keep it up, and you might look out your window and see the entire U.S. Fifth Fleet parked in the Persian Gulf. No clone stamping of ships required.

Same goes for everyone. No not that an aircraft carrier group might show up at your door. I mean maybe you dig sailors and you can hope, but no what I mean is that we can SEE YOUR EDITS.

The best editing work is done with such precision that to the studied glance, you would not be able to tell that anything was done. I get that we all want to put our best, most impressive images out there, but never at the expense of authenticity.

Next time Iran, just release the real photo, if you have one, and toss a yesteryear filter on it before you hit post.

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